How important is it? Can you live without it? Your name, that is.

We are all born without it, but our parents choose one, that will walk with us along our lives. We don’t have many choices, but to accept it when we’re young and maybe change it, when we grow older.  Did you ever think that it might shape your personality, it might make you do or not do certain things? It defines us in a way or another. Why is it, that first thing people do when introduce each other is saying their name. Because they feel the need to be heard, to be remembered. But name doesn’t say anything. It’s just a noun, like any other ones. It doesn’t say anything about you, about your soul, your likes or dislikes. If you know one’s name, doesn’t mean you know that person. It’s the same as looking at his/her Facebook or Instantgram and deciding you know them by what you see. A complete bullshit and sooner or later we all learn that.

For some, the name creates an identity, something you’re proud or ashamed of. But how would you feel if you lost your identity? If your name would be just another name that you hear every day, without meaning anything to you. I have thought about this for the last few weeks as my name began to lose its importance. I have never felt very strong about it, but lately there are times when I can’t even relate to it. It’s doesn’t describe who I am, it doesn’t make me special in anyway, After all, I’m just another face with a different name. That is why I never use it, only when I deal with legal matters.

I prefer nicknames. I had plenty of those so far. It might have been because my name was too difficult to remember or because people thought it didn’t suit me. Most of us have one nickname and stay with it for all their life. Well not me. Starting with “Lela”(when was 2 or 3 and it rhymed with my real name), “Paracetamola” (when I was 4 I resembled a paracetamol pill- big and round) and “Petru” (that’s how my father calls me as I’m his boy and girl). In elementary school I was “Didi” (I resembled Dexter’s sister) and in high school at the competitions I was participating people were always misspelling my surname and could never find myself on the lists. After graduating high school and going to University, guess what? Got a new nickname that lasted for 4 years. Everyone knew me by it, even the porters on our student hostels. Ready to find out which was the nickname that made me famous? It was “Xena, the warrior princess” or “Xena” for short. I guess I looked and behaved like her back then.

But things didn’t stop there. This year only, I have already succeeded in having three nicknames, all given by children. As no one can pronounce my name I decided for a short English version of it “Nelly”. But not everyone accepts it so I’ve been also called “Sammy” (have no idea where from) and “Tips” (who’s apparently a cartoon character in children’s imagination). Plus, at home, me and U.B. we always call ourselves by nicknames as it’s more personal.  And on this blog, I’m simply Mescalime, a bit of mescaline and some lime.:)

That’s me, different names, but one soul that doesn’t have a definition.

What about you? Do you relate to your name or it’s something you have to wear everyday like a uniform given from birth? All the best, my friends.

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