I knew photography was special to me in a way words cannot explain. I knew that, the moment I held my camera for the first time. I felt whole, like never before. I felt complete. And today, I know the feeling was real. I know this is part of me, the part that needed to be discovered, the part that was crying to be heard. And I listened to it. Glad I did.
Today I won. My first photography award. It’s not much, 2nd Place in National Award at Sony World Photography Awards but it’s the world to me in terms of photography. I knew this was an award winning photograph the moment I took it, but never dreamt so big. After all, I started photography exactly 1 year and 1 month ago and this is a great and wonderful surprise.
Two years ago I wrote my first post over here.It was about Women Rebellion and a very good subject to start with. Even though 2 years have passed from that, I still have the same beliefs and that gets me thinking. Do we really change? Do people change over time or is it more that we try to hide our own beliefs when society dictates it’s wrong to feel or think a certain way?
The more I get old, the more I realize I’ll never change. It’s true, I’ll learn new things, make new hobbies, but the truth is, the real me, will stay the same. And that is not a bad thing at all. It’s like a trademark, that each and everyone of us has, our own unique stamp in the world. I understand I’m not like the others and will never be, can’t be fitted in a place, because I can shift to different forms and shapes in an instant. Might be a strange individual to many, but got used in time, so it doesn’t bother me anymore. I try to channel my weirdness in creating and that is what I encourage everyone who sometimes feels like an outcast. Channel your energy and create something beautiful that tells a story different from what you’ve ever seen. Be outrageous, because great art always is and don’t apologize for your creations. That is who you are and I don’t believe Picasso ever apologized, nor did Dali. Be brave in your uniqueness. Let yourself shine!
A three years cycle is about to come to an end. I’ve always had a fascination for number 3 ever since I was a child and now I realised the magic in it. 3 years of being in a purgatory taught me lots of lessons. I’ve learned about myself more than I did before and became someone I love. It was tough, so tough I never thought I could make it, but I did through lots of meditation, reading and support. As I describe it, you might think I’ve been through war, but the reality wasn’t far from it.
I’m like a bird that likes to be free, to have no boundaries, to feel good once being up high. But this bird was caged in a place she didn’t fit. I was raised with the conviction to leave a place as soon as I start feeling anxious or restless in it. But now I stayed, because I had a goal and was ready to quiet myself down for it. Goal isn’t totally complete yet, but my time in the cage is.The time has come, to return to innocence, to the place I left 12 years ago. To return home.
Now let me tell you more about this 3 years. I’ve changed so much, I can’t recognize my old self. I’ve become more confident and more determined to do things that are right for me, not things people expect me to do. I found my inner voice and true calling and I must be thankful for the hard times. Because without them, I might have stayed on the same track of undecided people. I am thankful my life has a meaning, I am thankful I am with somebody crazy enough to understand my craziness, I am happy I am here. 3 years ago, I had no idea what to do with my life, I was living regretting the time was passing by and was feeling sorry for myself. Today, I am bolder than I’ve ever been, I believe in myself and am ready for the next step. I know my worth and will stop making any compromises if that means bringing me down. My life has a meaning and must is what I chose.
Should is how people want us to live our lives. […] Must is who we are, what we believe and what we do when we are alone with our truest, most authentic self. It’s that which calls to us most deeply. It’s our convictions, our passions, our deepest held urges and desires- unavoidable, undeniable and inexplicable. […] Choosing MUST is the greatest thing we can do with our lives. The Crossroads of Should and Must: Find and Follow Your Passion, by Elle Luna
To find your call and go for it takes lots of courage and perseverance. It’s not an easy road, but it’s where I want to be and it’s where I know I will be the best I can be. I won’t stop, because I don’t want to kill my soul. The decisions were tough to make, cards were dealt and I got a lucky hand. Now it’s up to me how I play it.
Remember:
It’s your life, but only if you make it so. The standards by which you live, must be your own standards, your own values, your own convictions in regard to what is right and wrong, what is true and false, what is important and what is trivial.- Eleanor Roosevelt
I am tired of living in a world surrounded by sleeping people, by people who are afraid to speak up their mind and by people who try to use you every time possible. I am tired of greedy souls, of fake faces and rotten souls. I am tired of listening to empty words and most of all I am tired of slavery. This slavery we all accept and hope one day we’ll have the courage to speak up and change the world. You know, the society won’t change if you ask for your rights and plead for justice, but one thing will change for sure and that is the world around you. You’ll cause a wave and waves, if they are strong enough can become tsunamis. So don’t sit there and hold your breath or bite your tongue. Make your voice loud and give power to your words. No one will do it for you, because no one cares. If you speak loud enough, you might wake up some sleepy souls and they might realise it’s time to change and stay awake. Because the problem is our lack of observance and our fear of change, of breaking the rules, of being rebels. Why you might ask if you are too afraid to answer it yourself. It’s because you will stand there alone, no one will cheer you up, no one will agree. You will have to fight your fight on your own and that takes a lot of courage. If you are up to it, don’t have second thoughts, because those thoughts will put you down, break you, make you one of the many others who are too afraid to live.
I decided to fight my battles on my own, with my bare hands and strong words. Am not turning back because am up for a change. After all, I love autumn and autumn is a season of change.
Coming home from work today I thought about this summer and how it changed me. It was probably one of the toughest summers in my life, but I’ve managed to survive. It was mentally exhausting, therefore my energy level was constantly very low. I couldn’t concentrate as much as I wanted on the things I love, I didn’t write anything, didn’t checked my blog for nearly one month and many times couldn’t bring myself together to do something constructive. I couldn’t find my words most of the time. It’s like I was caught in a game, where words were flying around me, but I couldn’t catch any. Must admit I learned some more things about photography and did a few awesome shots, but it doesn’t feel enough.
As I am sipping from a glass of wine I’m thinking of the lessons I’ve learned this summer. One of them was to speak out my mind, because if I don’t no one will do it for me. If I don’t like something to point it out, instead of biting my tongue and walking away. One of the reason I changed was the result of meeting many people and none of them my kind. That shouldn’t have been a problem if those people were nice or at least decent, but it wasn’t the case. So after a breakdown in the middle of the summer I changed completely. I realised ignoring was the best option for the sake of my sanity. So the more Zen I become the angrier they get. I realised in the equation I need to be selfish and think of my well being, otherwise my mood will suffer loads. There are goals I need to focus on at the time being and all the other things are just details. People’s opinion about me is not that important as long as I know who I am and what I’m capable of. And believe me when I say, we are capable of great things, we just have to believe in ourselves and our greatness.
Have been gone for some time, life got a bit busy, my PC got attacked by a virus and I kept on promoting my photography and participating in contests. Have been meaning to write a post, but felt like I had nothing important to say, up until now.
Last month I created a Facebook photography page to post my photographs and began to join photography groups. Was a bit shy in the beginning to post anything, but then I realized had nothing to lose so I started uploading my photographs. One day, two weeks ago, I posted a photograph I truly like. It resemble a painting and that is what makes me like it so much. It’s not the usual flower macro photography you see everywhere so I wasn’t prepared for the comments that followed. One guy asked where was the focus in the photo, while other said it’s on my logo. I felt like I wanted to hide in a cave. The worst part was I couldn’t reply to those comments so I had to let them say whatever they wanted. Another person said they quite liked the approach as it reminded him of a painting. And that was the decisive moment I realize my vision in photography is different from the others and that is not a bad thing at all. After that incident, three on my photos were selected as covers for different photography groups, meanwhile I am waiting for one of my photograph to be part of an exhibition somewhere in the town, next month.
All these last weeks events made me realize one thing: when you want to follow your dream, you will encounter obstacles and trip over, maybe fall down a couple of times, but you should never give up. The path you chose to walk on has nothing to do with the obstacles. They are there to make your journey more interesting. They might stop you for a while, but they should never make you turn around. Think of all the energy you put into those dreams and you will realize how important they are. I am ready to go on the path I chose and become the best I can be. You should do the same:
Dreaming is my favorite thing to do, before, after and while sleeping, so it occupies most of my time. However after intense research and analyze (while on conscious mode) I realized that successful people, the ones I always looked up in awe, were different then the rest of us. They made their dreams come true.
They are dreamers transformed into DO-ers. It’s not enough to just dream of things, you have to do them in order to be happy. There are so many people who dream big, but they got overwhelmed in time or get bored of dreaming. I heard so many times the phrases “It’s not for me”, “I’m too old” and “I just wasn’t lucky enough” to an extent I thought they were right and we are all going to end up like that. I was in that situation for some time, still am in my bad days. But when the veil of darkness passes and my senses come back I realize following dreams implies failures and moments of doubt. Failure is just a sign that you are doing something, that you are trying. Don’t let that stop you.
After watching this video I realized that dreaming should occupy less of my time, otherwise I will end up with one of the phrases I mentioned before. Dreaming is not enough, it’s time to make them a reality. Let your bud grow and flower so you can be admired and looked up to.
For as long as I can remember adventure meant something exiting and great that happened to brave people, to people who travel to exotic locations looking for hidden treasures. I dreamed of these kind of adventures with my eyes wide open, hoping one day I will be one of those people.
But that was then and this is now. And as the seasons change, I also changed and realized my adventure started a long time ago and became an ongoing process. You see, the dictionary describes adventure as “an unusual and exciting or daring experience” and so I realized adventure became my daily life. Stepping out of my comfort zone, speaking up my mind, doing something differently, trying something new, they all become an adventure.So go on, open that closed door and step into an uncomfortable zone, because there’s no point on not doing it. Adventure starts, when you sellotape the voices in your brain and go with your guts.
Helpful articles to improve your own nature and landscape photography explorations. You will also see stunning landscape and nature photographs created by award winning landscape and nature photographer Melissa Fague.
